Your Townie Neighbor Providing Directions In Your Rapidly Gentrifying Neighborhood

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To the Grocery Store

So right here’s what you do, you’re taking a proper on the finish of this road. When you get to the place, it was once a VFW — now it’s some sword-throwing bar? I dunno if I belief beer and swords collectively, however the children appear to love it. Bang a left there and hold going three lights till you get to the espresso store that was once Dunks, now the espresso’s 5 and a half bucks and tastes bitter. They name it a “pour over” however I believe it’s overly poor. Get it? Anyway, you’re taking a proper. Go previous the old Blockbuster. Grocery retailer is true subsequent to it — was once a pleasant family-owned enterprise. The man lived proper down the road from right here and his brother lived subsequent door. Now it’s a Whole Foods. Hope you want fancy faux cheese. Seems to me it should be cheaper than the true stuff, don’t you suppose?

To the Post Office

Go left, right down to the place they only put in that inexperienced metropolis bike dock. Try to not hit anybody on these bikes that people depart in every single place now, they’re all over and nobody makes use of them proper. We’re getting some sort of digital scooter now too. What occurred to strolling? Too a lot give you the results you want children? Take a proper till you get to the large signal that claims SPEAKEASY — was once my Knights of Columbus order. I’ll spare you the main points of after they made me eat a goldfish. Take a left. It’s subsequent to the place that solely sells bowls of rice with greens. I don’t know the identify, however you should be capable to scent the garlic out of your automobile.

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To the Hardware Store

Oh, that’s actually shut. You might most likely stroll there, however I wouldn’t — that a part of the neighborhood isn’t precisely nice. That’s why I can nonetheless afford my property taxes! But as quickly as we get the brand new bubble tea store up the road, I’m itemizing this place and shifting to Myrtle Beach. OK, you wanna strive strolling? Fine. So hold strolling down this road. When you get to the old sweet warehouse the place they’re placing in these new condos and also you’ll see an enormous mural of one thing — I believe it’s an octopus or an alien. I dunno, it’s inexperienced and has eyes. The ironmongery shop is throughout the road.

To the Community Art Collective

The what?

To the Bank

Do you need a financial institution with a teller or an ATM? You simply need money for the dispensary? OK, so the closest dispensary is definitely within the old Bank of America constructing however they stored the parking zone ATM. Just head south in direction of downtown however take a left on the empty Toys “R” Us. I can’t imagine they haven’t put something in that house but! Must be due to Amazon. I understand how to do it on my cellphone now! You like my rug? I purchased it on the bathroom. You should purchase something on the bathroom as of late. You received’t be capable to miss the dispensary. Smells just like the boiler room from my highschool. But these had been the ’60s. You graduated highschool in what year? Oh, 2010? You’ll like it right here. People nonetheless speak to one another sometimes and the diner simply began making avocado toast. I’ll let you know one thing: it’s not dangerous.

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